Yesterday was nice, huh? With the lack of complaining? Well, I hope you didn't get used to it because it's all over, my friends. I now bring you back to your regularly scheduled Snarkathon:

Ugh, I have such a headache. I'm sure it's partially due to the weird low-pressure weather and partially due to the rampant over-use of perfume in this office. I would love to send out a memo requesting everyone to go home and take a shower.

But yay, weekend! Nothing major going on this weekend- no bike races, no massive events, but I am looking forward to celebrating the birthday of a friend on Saturday and I also hope to get in a long bike ride on Sunday. Otherwise, I'm just looking forward to having a little time off and I might even clean the bathroom.

*******************************************

Cube Drone.

It's a busy day in the loan center and everyone is irritated and irritating. Or rather, I'm irritated and everyone else is irritating. I'm irritated because I have a huge stack of files to work my way through and I won't have time to write an entry today. Except that I seem to be writing it anyway? Ha.

Why everyone else is irritating: Milton has worn a groove in the industrial carpet with his constant backandforthbackandforth journeys to the printer. I'm sure he thinks he's being efficient, but really, why does it not occur to him to print out everything all at once? He's walked past my cube at least once every few minutes.

My boss is also extra-dithery today and has spent way, way too much time in the next-door cube, talking loudly with her chalkboard South Carolina drawl. And let's not forget my co-worker, Good Mom, who tends to sidle up silently behind me, never failing to startle.

I have my back to all this activity, which makes me super-flinchy. It's no wonder that I sometimes go sit quietly in my car during lunch breaks.

Just to further the irritating work behavior experience, I checked my official Bank of X email account (which I never use and rarely check) and I had FOUR email forwards from some woman I don't even know. Four. One was an *Angel Tag* chain letter (delete), one was called No You D'in't! (delete), one started out with "I know you love the Lord..." (DELETE) and the fourth one I didn't even bother with. Delete, delete, delete. It took every bit of self-restraint I had to not send snarky comments back to this woman, who doesn't even know me.

Dear Person I Don't Even Know,
What is wrong with you? Why are you under the delusion that I LOVE THE LORD? In fact, I hate him with every breath I take, every move I make. I'll be watching you.

Sincerely,

Satan (No you d'in't!)

*******************************************

I Feel Pretty.

Here's a bad thing to do on your lunch break: go try on cheaply-made bathing suits in a badly lit dressing room. Holy freaking hell. I tried on a bikini and instantly turned into Cathy with my "aack" and my thigh-related self-loathing. My boobs lost any perk they might have had before being forced into an unflattering triangle top and my ass was squoozing out the sides of the ill-fitting bottom. The bad lighting made me look green and blotchy and dumpy all at once. Cheap bathing suits are not worth the trauma. Hi, I'm a GIRL.

*******************************************

Fun With Links!

You think you work with morons? Check out the most excellent Chronicles of George.

Have a few hours to waste? Project Euh.

Check out Another Poster For Peace, a site of "copyright-free art for public use". (Link courtesy of Scrubbles.net.)

Have good weekends, my little monkeys!

0 chatty monkeys