I missed my third anniversary! I can't believe it. On December 31st, 2002, I started this journal as a way to combat insanity while working a crappy temp job. Now here I am three years later, still sporadically updating on my latest bitchy whines. It's been a pretty interesting three years, for sure, and I haven't evolved one iota. Sweet.

So last night I had a mini-meltdown about the simplest basic issue that derails me over and over again. Things don't work. All that I really want is for things to work properly. I am ALL OVER that Dyson guy. I want to hump his $500 vacuum cleaner simply because it does what it's supposed to do. If I had $500 I'd totally buy one just so I had ONE THING that worked properly.

Last night: My attempts to wear something cute to a party was foiled by clothing foibles. My shoes? Cute as all fuck but take three steps and the sling back part slips right down off my heel. My top? Too tight, but only just around my never-going-to-be-flat stomach. My jeans? Cutting in just at the wrong place. My hair? Actually, my hair was not so bad. I gave it a raise and fired the rest.

Part of the problem is that I buy everything on sale or from consignment shops. I buy other people's failures. All that shit in the consignment shop is there for a reason, a fact that I often seem to overlook. I feel like I'm rescuing abandonned items only to find that they were bad seeds to begin with and now I'm stuck with a closet full of not-quite.

Add to that my car, which has heaps of issues and my body which seems to be giving me lip as well. How can I not work right? I lift weights and ride a bike and suddenly for no reason at all I get knee pain. It pisses me off because it's not like I run on pavement every day! I do low-impact, muscle-building workouts and there's no call for random knee pain.

Speaking of body issues, why is it that WE don't work right? We get sick all the time, our eyes fail, our teeth grow in crooked; our joints blow out, what gives? Why don't we work the way we're designed to work? It is very upsetting. I posed this question last night to Kate and Justin and Justin gently pointed out that perhaps we're not done evolving. Oh. Okay, that actually makes a lot of sense. Life itself is a work in progress. What happens when things get perfect? When everything evolves to it's absolute most perfect state? I'm not sure, but I'm positive that we will never know because we'll have fucked it all up long before that happens. Comforting, that's my style.

Wah wah wah wah. I know. Only an American with a houseful of everything she needs could possibly come up with a problem as petty as "I want things to work!" I just get so frustrated with the generally non-pleasingness of my stuff. Cry me a river, I know.

Since I couldn't possibly be more boring today, how about my yearly highlights and lowlights?

Hightlights:

- The advent of Keen Designs
- Another sweet year in the cutest house on the block with the cutest guy, ever.
- Summer camp with the Internet Dork Club.
- a lovely visit from my favorite aunt and uncle.
- I read 29 1/2 books this year (which is 5 and 1/2 down from last year, but I was slack about updating and I'm sure I missed a few)
- I still love my job and I had the same job for the entire calendar year? That hasn't happened in years.

Lowlights:

- My car? Still dying. I say this every year, so why stop now?
- I didn't do anything painterly to the house this year. I suck.
- I owe, I owe, I oweIoweIowe.

Wow, if that's the worst that I got than things aren't so shitty. Happy new year!

3 chatty monkeys