I'm Afraid of Americans
Friday, Nov. 05, 2004 @ 3:32 p.m.

So today I woke up without so much of the sucking dread that's become my general mood post-election. I took it really personally and I'm still grieving the loss of it - the loss of any liberal handhold in the Senate, the loss of rights for children, women and gay couples, the loss of the separation of church and state, all of it, just too much to take. I was a little surprised at my emotional reaction and realized that I'd foolishly let myself hope that 50% of Americans weren't completely deluded and that democracy would work or something. Stupid me. Also, fucking Diebold had something to do with it as well, but that's another entry.

I'm still working through the various stages of grief but I don't have that awful devastated fug hanging over me anymore. I think my shock and sadness has been slowly building into anger and disgust with a nice side dish of despair. I'm just so fucking disappointed. I hope everyone who voted for Bush enjoys their evangelical theocracy. Madamepierce said it all really well in this entry.

Otherwise, the week has been okay, I guess. I had my last massage scheduled for Wednesday night, which was great timing because I really, really needed it. The therapist, who'd never uttered a word during my other two massages, saw how dejected I looked and understood immediately so we chatted about the election for a minute or two at the beginning of the massage and then I made a huge mistake. She mentioned walking her dogs to the polls and I asked what kind of dogs she had. Big. Mistake.

I'd somehow opened up a Pandora's box of DOGGY CHIT CHAT. I asked about them and she told me about them...for the entire hour. Ugh. Eventually I stopped responding to her stories hoping she'd get the hint but I don't even think she cared and it certainly didn't seem to matter if I was listening or not. I now know more about border collies than I'd ever cared to, thanks. Really, I like dogs and I don't mind pet stories, but I'm having a massage! It was a little weird and made it hard for me to relax. Poor me, I know, complaining about my free massage.

Apparently some of my disgust and anger is spilling over into other parts of my life, parts that include Janet's incredibly bad grammar. Here's Janet's latest "review." Goddamn with the quotation marks, Janet. I finally snapped and sent her this incredibly rude but much-needed email:

Dear Janet, I've winced through one too many or your misused quotation marks, so I give you:

A Lesson in Quotation Mark Usage

Quotation Marks for Words
Use quotation marks to indicate words used ironically, with reservations, or in some unusual way.

The great march of "progress" has left millions impoverished and hungry.

For words used as words themselves or for technical or unfamiliar terms used for the first time (and defined), use italics.

The English word nuance comes from a Middle French word meaning "shades of color."

The use of chiasmus, or the inversion of syntactic elements in parallel phrases, can create rhetorically powerful expressions.

Unnecessary Quotation Marks
Do not use quotation marks for common nicknames, bits of humor, technical terms that readers are likely to know, and trite or well-known expressions.

Probably mean and also will not be taken seriously, but damn, I had to try. I just don't understand why she thinks all those quotation marks are necessary. Like, Janet, dude, you can actually watch the orders go by. I'm not sure what exactly you're implying when you say you're �watching orders go by." It means something different when you "add" quotes. I don't know that she'll "get" it, but if she replies, I'll post it here. For sure.

Alright, rumor has it that I'm supposed to be acting as a courier for some proposal so I should wrap this up. It's a lame entry today but I've had a lame week. Here's to hoping we all have a good weekend.

3 chatty monkeys

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