Electrical Fruit and Fabio
Thursday, Aug. 12, 2004 @ 12:48 p.m.

Hi there. Did you guys miss me? I've been busy at work and riding my bike and stuff. You know, stuff. Hell, nobody missed me, did they. Shut up, you're just saying that. I know you, big liar. To be honest, I'm pretty boring now that I'm all happy and shit. My job is great, home life is good, really, I've got nothing to complain about.

Hell, last Friday I got off work at noon so I could go to Busch Gardens for free, courtesy of my employer. How nice is that? I went with Kenny and Kate and Justin and we had a rollicking good time, making fun of couples in matching Jesuswear and marveling at the proliferation of fanny packs. We rode the rollercoaster on which Fabio had his unfortunate nasal/goose incident. Which still makes me laugh. "Ow! My beautiful nose!" We also went on the Roman Rapids ride in which I got stuck under the waterfall (which I absolutely knew would happen) and was shivering and soaking wet for the rest of the evening. Overall it was fun, despite the absolutely horrible "picnic" we were served for dinner. Mmmm...starchy.

**********

So, as you know, my sad little car only has a radio (which only works when the power button is held in with a wodge of paper) and I've found myself, more and more, listening to Oldies and Classic rock. Some of those songs? Weird shit, man. Weird hippie shit. I'm serious, have you ever actually listened to the lyrics of "Mellow Yellow"? Ee-Lec-Tric-Al Bah-Nah-Na? What the hell is that all about? What is Donovan on? Wait, don't answer that. But really, is he talking about his dick? Or a joint? Or what, exactly? I just shake my head.

And this morning, I found myself singing along with "Dancing In The Moonlight". How do I even know the words to this? Who even sings this? Damn dirty hippie song, invading brain space! The space in my brain that was reserved for short term memory and math is actually filled with really awful lyrics. I know lyrics to songs I've never even heard before, or so it would seem.

There is a lot of good stuff played on the Oldies/Classic rock stations. I'll listen to anything by Dylan, The Beatles (well, except for �Penny Lane� which was completely ruined by a terrible 70's made-for-TV movie starring Shaun Cassidy as a retarded guy who sings �Penny Lane� over and over again.), Paul Simon, The Zombies, The Beach Boys and Queen. Shut up, I like Queen. I do a mean "Bohemian Rhapsody", but only in my car.

Also, the Classic station has started playing selections from U2's Joshua Tree, which really threw me until I realized that album is nearly twenty freaking years old, which would make me incredibly old and crusty myself. I remember listening to that album over and over again on a really crappy Walkman when I was thirteen or fourteen. So deliciously angsty, that one. I remember that REAL U2 fans used to scoff at "Joshua Tree" because anyone who liked it was obviously a poseur who didn't bother with the REAL U2 albums like War and Boy. I was more or less born a poseur though, so this didn't really phase me.

**********

Worst contests ever.

So I'm still working on the contest entry thing and I haven't won a horse or Mini Cooper yet. I have, however come across a couple of contests that no one in their right minds would want to enter, much less win. I mean, sure, Tiger Woods is talented and all, but who wants to win his used shoes? Grody, man. But oh, the crowning glory of all bad contests has got to be this one. Go take a look and then I'll explain because the contest has ended. Did you look? Dude, I know. The prize was a 3-day/2-night trip for two (winner and spouse only) to Los Angeles, CA, for the opportunity to have dinner with Trista & Ryan from The Bachelorette. Can you imagine an evening more appropriate for Seppuku? The best part? It's sponsored by LUBE. Hi, yes, K-Y Jelly? Please sign me up to go on vacation with the most annoying fake couple of all times. Thank you.

Hey monkeys! Check out my sister's newly-pimped out journal! She's a real writer and everything, so please to be reading.

1 chatty monkeys

last
next
archives
newest
random!
email
notes
profile
reading
links
Keen Designs
Amblus Loves Bikes
Craft Mafia Blog
freshhell
skibigsky
captvfirefly
Smartypants
mayapple
emiloo
schmutzie
legalbeagle
lasvegasliz
gem-chan
Essaywriter
xnavygrrl
rs536-2000
harri3tspy
smedindy
www.flickr.com

design
diaryland

join my Notify List and get email when I update my site:
email:
Powered by NotifyList.com