Hi, it's been a long time. I missed you. Last week I think I started about four different entries, but I was busy as hell at work, so none of them actually got posted. I saved Friday's attempt and will add it to this one. Lucky you!

Sometimes I don't write entries because I'm busy, but sometimes it's because I feel like watching bad reality television instead. Or sometimes, it's because the minute I get online at home one of the cats decides its THE PERFECT TIME to take a big dump, thus rendering the computer room un-useable for a long time. Note to self: move litter pan.

So anyway, the big news, if you want to call it that, is that I finally got tired of living in a purple cave. I decided it was time to get painting. It's only been, what four months since we moved?

I don't actually know how to paint a room, so I've gotten lots of advice from very nice people (if you have some great advice, please don't share it with me. I'm already overwhelmed and ready to low-knap roll myself in some pearl finish paint.) I know now that have to paint the ceiling, which is something that never occured to me. Ever. I don't want to. But I didn't want to wash with TSP and sand and prime and I did all that, with help from Kenny. We started with the dining room and I would like to kill the previous owner for the following:

- dark teal semi-gloss paint on the walls (including the baseboards)
- beige sponge-painted trim
- dark grey window frames

Die, lady.

The plan is to paint the dining room a pale chartruse-y green, with maybe a darker shade under the chair rail. The trim will be off-white. Then, I want to paint the living room a cream color, with the main long wall a dark red. The downstairs bathroom will eventually be a lavender/pale violet color, but I have to figure out what to do about the bubbling painted-over plaster above the bathtub. Ugh.

In case you forgot, here are some visuals for what I'm dealing with: Purple Cave

It's all going to take forever, but I'm excited about making it all exactly how we want it. To get some inspiration, I went to Barnes & Noble to buy an interior decorating magazine, but there were too many and they were all super-specific (Bungalow Style? Southern Living County Kitchen Decor? New Modern Home Six-Figure Income Decorating?) so I freaked out and left. My mom lent me copies of "Bungalow Bathrooms" and Bungalow Kitchen" which would be awesome if we actually had a bungalow, but hey, our cape is small and cozy in the manner of, so close enough.

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Non-posted entry from Friday:

I'm having a shitty day. Really, it's the most annoying day for a variety of small and annoying reasons:

- minute fruit flies at my desk (where are they coming from?? Gah!)

- the way a co-worker pronounces "m m" when spelling out his last name with a strong southern accent (sounds like "Eyuum Eyuumm".)

- the annoying new temp's lack of VOLUME CONTROL (And while we're on the subject I should add: her UPBEAT complaining. And hers sweaters with reindeer patterns worn with rubber LL Bean shoes. Also, her obsession with THE WEATHER. As in "I here it's going to SNOW TONIGHT. I really hope it DOESN'T but they said it was GOING TO" and "GOLLY, it's really COLD OUTSIDE!" She's the kind of person who interupts you continuously while you're talking, in order to vigorously agree with you. Moving on.)

- State-I-Don't-Live-In Chat stupidity (see Idiot Chat Transcript below)

- my computer, which likes to change formats on the fly.

- the bathroom door for it's long, slow squeak

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So, I'm bitching and grumbling and Oaf comes up and says "Hey, wanna hear something that will make your day better?" I nodded. He proceeds to tell me how the Fish Lady heard someone at the front door (which is generally kept locked) so immediately leapt up and made for the door in her single-minded way, forgetting to remove her telephone headset. He gave me the whiplash visual and everything. Yes, I know I'm going to hell but it made me laugh.

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Other non-day related things that make my monkey crazy:

- How Stacy on "What Not To Wear" has to say everything in the singular. Pant. Jean. Shoe. No, freak nugget, I wear two shoes and a pair of pants.

- People who use their car horn when picking someone up. Idling on the curb and honking is RUDE. I also saw a woman at the grocery store waiting in her car by the curb, honking to get the attention of the person who was bringing her groceries out. If it were me, I'd get that grocery cart rolling fast towards her car and just let go.

- Is there some unwritten rule that if you print your resume at work*, someone must immediately stand right behind you while you're waiting for it to finish printing?

* Right, I have a job interview on Wednesday. Before anyone gets too excited, I should probably admit that it's from the other small marketing company that I interviewed with last fall. The one who oftered me an entry level position with a jaw-droppingly low salary. Anyway, the owner emailed me out of the blue and said she had a position that was more in line with my experience. We'll see.

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Idiot's Chat Transcript

Me: Hello, Idiot. How may I help you?
Idiot: I was wondering what kind of license I would need for a computer/internet cafe and where would I get it?
Me: Just one moment while I try to find that answer for you.
Adrien: Restaurant and cafe licensing is done through the Clerk of the Circuit Court in each county. What county will your business be registered in?
Idiot: It's not a restaurant. We won't be serving food or anything of that sort.
Idiot: I'm thinking it's a general business license and it's going to be in AA county
Me: I'm sorry, I thought you said it was an Internet Cafe.
Idiot: Yes, but we won't be serving anyting. It's going to be self serve.

I don't even know anymore.

1 chatty monkeys