I had a great weekend. Really, it ruled. Most of it was spent doing the usual things: riding my bike, hanging out with family and friends, eating too much, shopping way too much.

I took yesterday off and spent the day wandering around Carytown with my aunt and mother. Later in the afternoon, we went back to my mom's house, drank too much wine and talked about stuff I won't even go into because you just had to be there. All in all, it was damn fun.

The only thing I failed to do this weekend was sleep. I have apparently lost the ability to fall asleep. I even read Palinode's excellent "How To Sleep" essay and it didn't work. I just haven't been able to turn my little brain off at night. I lie half-awake, haunted by lyrics from "Once More, With Feeling", mentally writing cover letters, or obsessing about money. All bad things when you want to sleep.

In other weekend news, I found FOUR jobs to apply to! Jobs that actually sound interesting! Now, if only they'd call me for an interview! Which never happens! Maybe these job ads are all an elaborate practical joke? Perhaps I should have been a little suspicious, based on this ad:

Hey there! Are you a super-slacker? Do you love to play on the Internet instead of applying yourself to drone work? Perhaps you'd like to come work for us! Hell, you can even work from home if you like! We provide generous health benefits, a competitive salary, and use of office pony and go-kart track! Knowledge of 'Buffy The Vampire Slayer' a plus. Person with first name that starts with "A" preferred. Don't even bother to send a resume, we know who you are. Job #8675309

I guess if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is?

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Half-Assed Movie Reviews.

I watched two videos this weekend and I thought I should tell you about them, so you won't have to.

Killing Me Softly.

Wow. What? Wow. Okay, so my friend Kate and I both read the book this movie is based on and it was trashy, but entertaining. It involved an obsessive relationship, some kinky sex, a murder, and mountain climbing. It's the kind of book you buy in an airport gift shop (which is exactly where it came from). Right on. Anyway, Kate heard that a movie was being made and we vowed to see it in all it's trashy glory, but then it never came out...in the theater. That's right! Straight! To! Video!

So I rented it, and damn. This movie is basically a vehicle for Heather Graham's breasts. If you want to see them (nice, but definitely fake) this is the movie to rent. Her boobs probably got paid more than she did. Or maybe the movie paid for the boobs? Either way, it was a festival of boobs.

It was also a festival of Really Bad Acting. Heather Graham and Joseph Fiennes have both done passably good work in the past, but not in this case. Mostly it's about Fiennes looking cross-eyed and creepy and Graham being vacant and confused. Really not a stretch for either of them. Don't bother unless you long to see the boobs Graham bought with her paycheck.

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Die Another Day.

Bond film, similar to every other. Cool gadgets, sexy ladies, prison torture, stuff blows up, 007 surfs like a pro. I sort of stopped paying attention at some point. Eh. I suppose it's worth a rent, but be warned- the title song, written and performed by Madonna, is played in it's entirety during the opening credits. What Madonna wants, Madonna gets, and apparently what Madonna wanted was to have the whole song played. She also wanted to be in the movie, which is never a good thing unless the movie is called "Desperately Seeking Susan". Anyway, rent it if you want. I don't care.

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Loan Center Fun.

Just announced: There's a Spirit Show tomorrow in the cafe! Bring your cow bell and don't forget to wear red, white and blue! Right, because that'll happen. Shit, I don't even wear green on St. Patrick�s day. I am a bad sport and proud of it. They better not do that maniacal Spirit Council greeting at the door tomorrow because my ass will turn right around and go home. It doesn't take much.

And, what could this show possibly consist of? Singing songs? Spirit chants? Group brainwashing? Will Kool-Aid be served? I'm not going to find out. No way.

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Live! Nude! Links!

Jesus God no. Emiloo broke the news to me about 'I'm With Busey'. Should I just leave the country? Is that what it's going to take?

Make mutant faces! Fun! Also, creepy! (via PCJM)

Scarysquirrel.org. Heh. I'm actually one of three people in the world who really loves squirrels.

Buffy fans, where do we go from here? (via tvtattle.com)

0 chatty monkeys