Hi there. Can you stand a few more pictures and commentary from my pained youth? I promise it stops after today. For real. I promise.

1988

In '88 I mainstreamed back into a regular school, but rather than send me to the hell portal public high school, I was sent to a (relatively) smaller all-girls Catholic school. Swell. After three years at the cozy 60-student dyslexic kid's school, I was now a very small and geeky fish in a medium-sized pond.

Mostly, I was ignored by the popular crowd, but in a we-don't-know-you way instead of outright snobbery. Fine, whatever. Then, I did something that changed all that. I became a Sponsor. What the hell is a Sponsor? I don't really know. I was one, but I'm still uncertain what it is, exactly. I'll try to explain:

My high school's brother school was an all-boys Catholic military school. Oh yes, such thing exists. Anyway, they had platoons (or companies?) and each company had a senior captain. Anyway, the captains were required to choose a girl as his Sponsor. This means the girl wore a weird outfit on drill days and was his escort to drills and the big deal Sponsors Ball (in which we wore white gowns and were "presented". Very archaic.) Being a sponsor was a huge honor among the girls who cared about such things and usually the most popular girls were picked.

The summer before my Junior year, I got asked. Shocking, as I only knew three guys in the whole school. The guy that asked me was the brother of a classmate, and he was incredibly shy and bookish and very, very smart. I was one of two girls he knew and the other (who was much too cool for such things) had turned him down. I was his last chance. I said yes, more out of pity than anything.

(The shy geeky boys, they loved me. I was kind, completely approachable and calmed their social awkwardness. Just call me the Nerd Whisperer.)

Anyway, being a sponsor got me noticed by the popular crowd ("Who's sponsor are you?" was actually spat at me at the first sponsor meeting. None of your business, bitch?) and, while I didn't get included in their blonde curl and frosty pink lipstick games, I was no longer invisible. High school became manageable, though I never stopped hating it.

Weird, huh? I still don't get it. And yes, I'm wearing saddle shoes. Yeah.

1989

This picture was taken outside the Byrd Theatre, where I started working (in full flapper garb) as a popcorn girl in the summer of '89. It was my first cool job, as I'd become one of the mysterious "Byrd Girls". Right on. I ended up working there until the year after I graduated college. I shed my outer geekness that summer and it was my first real step towards achieving any kind of cool.

What, the rolled jean shorts aren't cool?

1990

Prom. What a fiasco. My college freshman boyfriend broke up with me a week before my senior prom, so I begged my friend Coryndon to take me. He didn't want to, but did it for me anyway. Don't we look happy? It was a horrible night that ended with drunken tears.

The dress is vintage and is black velvet with fake diamond trim. I thought it was the height of cool, especially considering the fluffy pastel McClintock gowns the rest of the girls wore.

2003

And, just to round this out, I'm going to yadda yadda yadda right over college and many other life-building events and go right to present day:

This was taken at the Captech Classic race last Friday. Note the lovely helmet-hair!

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Really Random Links. Having Nothing To Do With My Lame Entry. For Real.

Stee's "Celebrity Interview: My Couch" is some super big hilarious funny.

Gwen Stefani is going to be in a movie...as Jean Harlow. Okay then. I love me some Gwen, but can she act? Guess we'll find out.

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