HI, MY NAME IS....TEMP.
Wednesday, Mar. 19, 2003 @ 3:33 p.m.

Apparently terrorists, disgruntled former employees and/or flying monkeys are going to invade the loan center any second now. ANY SECOND NOW. I was just forwarded a broadcast voicemail imploring employees to:

STOP. STOP AND LISTEN TO THIS VERY IMPORTANT MESSAGE. It has come to our attention that employees are piggybacking into the building instead of using their swipe badges. If you see an employee WITHOUT a badge, STOP THEM AND QUESTION THEM. If you're a TEMP, you need to get a temp badge IMMEDIATELY.

Great. I've worked here for 6 months and I've never even heard of a temp badge? Nice of them to not leave instructions on how to get one. Now, every time I follow someone into the building I'm going to be interrogated? The hell? What am I going to do, steal the Spirit Pledge? Please. It's just insane to expect that level of security from a bunch of disillusioned employees. It's not like the SECURITY GUARDS have anything to do with it. They never even look up from the desk when I come in.

The most ironic part? Temps aren't on the broadcast voicemail list, so, if Milton hadn't forwarded it to me, the above message would never have reached me. Basically, the message for the temps was sent to everyone but the temps. Right on.

Hahaha, I just went and got my official temp badge. It consists of a color copied card that says "Bank of X Temporary Contractor" in a little plastic card holder with a clip on the back. That's security, I tell you. Whew, thank God I have this high-tech card, thus helping to ensure the safety of the loan center. Thank God terrorists/flying monkeys/disgruntled former employees have no access to plastic card holders and color copiers. The Spirit Pledge is safe. Rest easy.

*****************************************

The Cozy War Corner.

Dude, I know. I really hate talking about the war and politics and I wanted my journal to be funny and a little snarky, but not serious. However, there is some Serious Shit going on right now and it would seem odd to not comment on it.

The trouble is, I don't know what to say that I've not already said. President bad. War bad. Survivor being pre-empted because of said war, really bad. See what I mean? I can't even stay serious when I'm in the Cozy War Corner! I'm such a naive, stupid American, worried that her reality tv show isn't going to be on because of some pesky war. But please know the humor is a cozy blanket for my freezing cold anger and frustration.

And now, as usual, I'm foisting off the war talk on another Diarylander and asking you to read Weetabix's excellent entry about international cocktail parties and freedom fries.

*****************************************

Entertaining Entertainment News.

I love knowing what the Coen Brothers are up to. Even though I'm not a 60 year old black woman, If they came here, I'd probably go to the casting call just for the hell of it. Ladykillers sounds like it's going to be excellent!

The Academy Awards are still a go, but they're scaling back on the red carpet festivities "to spare celebrities who might feel uncomfortable discussing films and fashion while American soldiers were putting their lives on the line". While I understand that a movie awards show during wartime can seem inappropriate, how is taking away the pre-show really going to help?

I think they just want to make sure the celebrities don't use the interview time to voice their political opinions. I enjoyed this nervous article about how the Academy's not worried about Susan Sarandon this year, even though she's presenting. I love how much she freaks out the right-wing.

And finally, file this under "Shamelessly Self-Absorbed and Creepy Celebrities". (Thanks to my friend Amy for finding this one!) .

*****************************************

A Little Linky Link.

Here is some really useless advice provided by the government: Don't be Afraid...Be Ready. And here are some helpful diagrams so you know what to do in case of a terrorist attack. Don't forget to duck and cover!

Ha! The French join the food war with Pretzels for Peace.

Dear Diaryland members, Bored? Take another Completely Pointless Survey.

0 chatty monkeys

last
next
archives
newest
random!
email
notes
profile
reading
links
Keen Designs
Amblus Loves Bikes
Craft Mafia Blog
freshhell
skibigsky
captvfirefly
Smartypants
mayapple
emiloo
schmutzie
legalbeagle
lasvegasliz
gem-chan
Essaywriter
xnavygrrl
rs536-2000
harri3tspy
smedindy
www.flickr.com

design
diaryland

join my Notify List and get email when I update my site:
email:
Powered by NotifyList.com