Funny Ha Ha or Funny Weird?

Not Funny:

I'm full of ire today, which is becoming a regular thing with me. I don't like being the downer, complainy girl, but I'm so frustrated with my situation and I'm feeling like a huge loser about my lack of job-getting skills (13 months of searching will do that to a girl). It's killing my self-esteem and turning me into an emotional ass.

This temp job, funny though it is to write about, is boring me to tears. I've been here too long and the soul-sucking has begun. When I started here, my mantra was "it's only for a month". Well, it's been nearly 5 months and nothing's changed. What the hell am I supposed to do?

If I don't start using my brain soon, it's going to atrophy and shrivel into a pea; a pea capable of retaining the lyrics to every bad pop song and nothing else. I applied to an interesting-sounding marketing job last night, which made me feel a little better, but I know I don't have a chance in hell of getting it. I can't stop trying though, because then what? I temp forever? Holy crap.

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Marginally Funny, petty work rants:

Milton keeps snorking into a handkerchief and making old man nose-blowing honk noises. Then he jokes about how he's going to give everyone his cold. Nas-tay. If you're sick, stay the hell home.

One of the Top Three Sounds Adrien Hates: the skritch-skritch-skritch of long fingernails scratching dry scalp. Don't you get a shiver down your spine just reading that? Don't you wish you'd never read that? Me too.

Someone working near me is wearing a cloying, gardenia-heavy perfume. I want to figure out who it is and beg her to go home and take a shower. I've had the worst headache all day because of it.

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Funny Looking:

Memo To: Helen Hunt
From: Your Stylist

So I was thinking, for the SAG awards we should go with something youthful. Something sassy and fresh! Prairie chic! I'm thinking platinum blonde hair. I'm thinking Laura Ingalls meets Daisy Duke. I'm thinking, like, four little French braids all tied up with fresh, white string. It'll be cute! You'll love it! Trust me!

Damn. Hell.

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Ha! E.Jean was on the Today Show this morning talking about Joe Millionaire, and she referred to the women as "chuckleheads". Is chucklehead the new black?

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